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Записи с темой: en (список заголовков)
03:19 

silly me

Генератор кубиков
Not my voice on the record, I said, it hurts, I said. Cause the record can be played, and the voice can be heard, reminding.
Well it's my music on the goddamned record. :lol:
Which probably means it's not played at all, with its perfectly fine voice part and all other aspects. But my hurt was most definitely misplaced.
I honestly wonder and obviously no one is going to answer. Still, silly how much time had to have passed for me to figure this inconsistency out.
Wonder why that makes me huff with laughter.

@темы: поток сознания, EN

17:56 

I needed it

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They did it!
:vict::dance3::dance3::dance3::dance3::vict:

It's been awhile since they did, actually, but I only recently found the way to ascertain. It's also been a couple days since I did, and initially I was content with that, but just for the sake of continuity.
Also got the unexpected bonus in that they've done more than one of those. And might add more. What about me, the more the merrier.
At least something in life is good.

@темы: поток сознания, EN

21:07 

...

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@музыка: Tiamat - Teonanacatl

@темы: поток сознания, EN

21:16 

fic dump

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14:07 

okay...

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05:35 

oh well

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Not so much cliche as it's AU. They took Teri Miller, the anthropologist, in the part that it's a character from a good side with sought-out skill, and pulled Millander's appearance and personal story upon. And changed the first meeting (to something very out of character, I might add).
Disappointing.
I'm not reading the other ones though.

@темы: EN, CSI

20:54 

isn't it right

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What is that saying, again? Whatever twisted thing you thought of, someone else has thought of first?
CSI, 2x13, major plot twist on one of recurring perpetrators. Paul Millander. I didn't go there before, but after that one... I just had to check AO3. So I typed his name. Three results. Only one doesn't list him in a pairing. Two others do. Guess who's the other guy.
The second one is so many types of wrong from the summary and tags alone I'm not going anywhere near it, the one that doesn't pair Millander is odd on the other accounts, but the first one... whoever wrote that, they saw what I saw and thought something along the same lines of what I thought, and went with it — for the whole of 40k words.
It's called All That I Am.
Honestly? I'm a little afraid to read it.
But I admire the size.
It's either cliche to the extreme, or very good. Those things, so far from mainstream, don't tend to be average.
The thing is, I don't actually ship it. It was just a thought. Granted, without that kind of thought no shipping would occur, but there's no guarantee that there would necessary be any with it.
But I did have the thought. And I did come looking. Specifically, even though I only typed one name, looking for slash.
Well, seek, and ye shall find. (Religious folks would so hate me for using that quote on such matter.)

@темы: припала к канону, поток сознания, EN, CSI

10:53 

oh hot damn

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Currie Graham (think Walter Mashburn in The Mentalist) is playing in Westworld. There, I'll have to watch it.

@темы: The Mentalist, EN, актеры и модели

00:08 

oh wow

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Watched the stats for the Russian variant of "It - something", and ficbook says there's a referral from mail.yandex.ru. Which means, someone actually deemed it worth sending a link to this piece to someone else by e-mail. I mean, holy cow! Odd like I don't know what, but hey, feels nice too.

@темы: поток сознания, EN

12:06 

...

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Sometimes I check my drafts and they're fine. Sometimes... they're not. :facepalm3:
It's such a pain to find out I tried to write sappy fluff. Dammit. Good mysterious beginning. Good ending! Nice moments in between. Awful premise and overall plot. Damn.
Some of the moments are even salvageable as in I can move them into another piece, since, you know, same headcanon. Some aren't. Good, but specific to that particular sappy plot. Damn.
Should have finished it before realizing it's awful, maybe. But I'm glad I didn't.
Oh well.

@темы: EN, зародыш текстоты, нытье без жилетки

15:49 

Supernatural

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So there are several interesting episodes.
1x01 and 1x03 just for kicks (Sarah Shahi and Amy Acker being said kicks);
2x11 "Playthings" (man, those dolls are creepy, but I so dig the dollhouse copy of the hotel);
and 2x16 "Roadkill", currently holding the top prize (but for the record, the husband is a jerk);
2x17 is good too.

But damn, with the way logic is screwed every other episode, it's sooo low for me...

@темы: припала к канону, Supernatural, EN

18:51 

5x05

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Just one more before I should go home.

читать дальше

Go Team Machine. :pc: :heart:

@темы: EN, Person of Interest, припала к канону, фак мой мозг

17:31 

5x04

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16:26 

5x03

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Okay, I have some time...

not sure how to react

Go Team Machine. :pc: :heart:

@темы: EN, Person of Interest, припала к канону

04:46 

darn...

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Okay, I give up.
I am attention starved, not just appear so.
It's the only reasonable conclusion from my recent reactions.
So.
How do we go about fixing that, hmm?

@темы: фак мой мозг, EN

01:26 

lock Доступ к записи ограничен

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Закрытая запись, не предназначенная для публичного просмотра

URL
23:48 

I don't know

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I don't know how people work between themselves.
And I try to write, heh.
I guess I do when I write, but not when it comes to me, in real life.
I see one character asking another "Walk with me?" in an entirely neutral circumstance, and I wonder, "wow, people do that?" But they do. I know they do. I did. I walked with that guy from machines through the exhibition for three hours, talking stuff (machines, mills, lasers, other equipment, what they do, what we do, etc), and it was just a social thing, a courtesy thing. People do that. It's not black and white. Interpersonal interaction is not a choice between the white of "strong common interests" or "being a team" or "romantic interest" and the black of aggression and violence. Sometimes people just do nice stuff together without one investing something first. It happens, really happens. Why don't I know that on some instinctual level?
Why is it that I think that if I don't invest something first, there's no good interaction to follow?
I don't mean money. It's seldom money that I invest. Usually effort.
And isn't it why my creativity is failing me lately? That I used it all up, paying for people being nice?
I really should go to the 'con. Even if they end up providing no dance classes (there's a line in the description, but none in the actual schedule). Just for that nice feeling. For pleasant interaction. Paying the price for the ticket is actually cheaper that what I normally do, effort-wise. Simply because an hour of my good work is worth much more.
Which means I need to buy dancing shoes tomorrow. Just in case there are dance classes. If there aren't, I can use them at a later date.

And goddamn hell, I wonder if my mode of operation of bying my way into someone's graces with fan-content is viewed as seeing and appreciating that person's work instead of the person themselves. I guess it does.
At least it did once.
I'm so freaking sorry.

@музыка: Jem - It's Amazing

@темы: фак мой мозг, поток сознания, EN

09:15 

lock Доступ к записи ограничен

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Закрытая запись, не предназначенная для публичного просмотра

URL
16:02 

why do you

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@музыка: Beloved Enemy - Rain

@темы: EN

12:11 

dammit

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DAMMIT!
Dammit dammit!
Why am I doing this.
It's... it's a good emotion, overall, actually. Fun, somewhat... but god, does it tear at me. And I want to scream, and there's no point, and I know what I should really do, what might fix it, but it's hard, god dammit it's hard, and most of the time I'm so weary I've grown indifferent, but I decided to - well, no actually it happened accidentally - anyway, I ended up refreshing it all, jump-starting that drive while opening that old wound as well, and dammit, dammit! What do I do, how do I keep that drive and not that pain? How do I save myself from that excruciating regret? How do I do it?

@темы: EN, поток сознания

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