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Записи с темой: поток сознания (список заголовков)
13:37 

пока не забыла

Генератор кубиков
Мой мозг вообще любитель выдавать упоротые сюжеты, но это надо записать, я считаю.
Упоротый сюжет

@музыка: Ed Sheeran - Shape Of You

@темы: The Terminator, поток сознания

16:54 

Ааааааа!

Генератор кубиков
У буржуев медные трубы!
Впервые заметила в каком-то процедурале, может, в CSI. Там так походя "вот тут вода натекла, в ней ржавчина, не могла быть из крана, потому что во всем здании поставили медные трубы". Ну, может латунные, а не медные, но они говорят copper pipes. То есть не дурацкое железо, а клевые, нержавеющие трубы! Целые трубы, машувать, по всему зданию, а не маленький фитинг или эксцентрик в квартире перед краном!
У меня еще тогда полыхнуло, а сейчас я смотрю первую серию Декстера, и их там показали! Они реально, блин, медные! (Ну или латунные такого красноватого оттенка.)
Блин, когда у нас так будет? :fire:

@темы: нытье без жилетки, поток сознания

03:19 

silly me

Генератор кубиков
Not my voice on the record, I said, it hurts, I said. Cause the record can be played, and the voice can be heard, reminding.
Well it's my music on the goddamned record. :lol:
Which probably means it's not played at all, with its perfectly fine voice part and all other aspects. But my hurt was most definitely misplaced.
I honestly wonder and obviously no one is going to answer. Still, silly how much time had to have passed for me to figure this inconsistency out.
Wonder why that makes me huff with laughter.

@темы: поток сознания, EN

17:56 

I needed it

Генератор кубиков
They did it!
:vict::dance3::dance3::dance3::dance3::vict:

It's been awhile since they did, actually, but I only recently found the way to ascertain. It's also been a couple days since I did, and initially I was content with that, but just for the sake of continuity.
Also got the unexpected bonus in that they've done more than one of those. And might add more. What about me, the more the merrier.
At least something in life is good.

@темы: поток сознания, EN

20:30 

...

Генератор кубиков
...а вообще, если у меня получится, то отсюда, наверное, я пропаду.
Ну, может, не пропаду, если будет ФБ. Но глядя на то, как я регулярно полу-сливаюсь (ну куда анимированному коллажу против текста?), думается, что и ФБ не гарантия.
И не то, чтобы мне хочется прям сховаться и не высовываться. Просто у меня сильно ограниченное количество сил на сказать. Сказала тут - не сказала там.
И тут прошлый дневник такой глядит немым укором. Да, по темам совпадает. Но не писать же туда теперь? Мало ли что у меня получается.

@темы: поток сознания

21:07 

...

Генератор кубиков

@музыка: Tiamat - Teonanacatl

@темы: поток сознания, EN

20:54 

isn't it right

Генератор кубиков
What is that saying, again? Whatever twisted thing you thought of, someone else has thought of first?
CSI, 2x13, major plot twist on one of recurring perpetrators. Paul Millander. I didn't go there before, but after that one... I just had to check AO3. So I typed his name. Three results. Only one doesn't list him in a pairing. Two others do. Guess who's the other guy.
The second one is so many types of wrong from the summary and tags alone I'm not going anywhere near it, the one that doesn't pair Millander is odd on the other accounts, but the first one... whoever wrote that, they saw what I saw and thought something along the same lines of what I thought, and went with it — for the whole of 40k words.
It's called All That I Am.
Honestly? I'm a little afraid to read it.
But I admire the size.
It's either cliche to the extreme, or very good. Those things, so far from mainstream, don't tend to be average.
The thing is, I don't actually ship it. It was just a thought. Granted, without that kind of thought no shipping would occur, but there's no guarantee that there would necessary be any with it.
But I did have the thought. And I did come looking. Specifically, even though I only typed one name, looking for slash.
Well, seek, and ye shall find. (Religious folks would so hate me for using that quote on such matter.)

@темы: припала к канону, поток сознания, EN, CSI

00:08 

oh wow

Генератор кубиков
Watched the stats for the Russian variant of "It - something", and ficbook says there's a referral from mail.yandex.ru. Which means, someone actually deemed it worth sending a link to this piece to someone else by e-mail. I mean, holy cow! Odd like I don't know what, but hey, feels nice too.

@темы: поток сознания, EN

21:00 

lock Доступ к записи ограничен

Генератор кубиков
Закрытая запись, не предназначенная для публичного просмотра

URL
15:47 

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Генератор кубиков
Закрытая запись, не предназначенная для публичного просмотра

URL
23:08 

мой реал в десяти словах

Генератор кубиков
15:45 

lock Доступ к записи ограничен

Генератор кубиков
Закрытая запись, не предназначенная для публичного просмотра

URL
00:44 

позавчера...

Генератор кубиков
Позавчера я сказала себе "завтра возвращаюсь в строй".
Ух ты, из этой фразы получились бы отличные стихи, если выровнять и добавить идею. Но в стихосложении я не сильна.
В общем, к позавчера я понемногу пришла в норму, потихоньку перемыла посуду, сделала минимальную гимнастику, почти приготовилась шагнуть обратно в реальный мир.
В общем, как обычно, когда составляешь план без магической фразы "если ничего не случится"...
В сухом остатке имеем головную боль весь день, что достаточно редко, и абсолютную тупизну ума, что не так редко, к сожалению.
В общем, завтра (то есть уже сегодня) попробуем еще раз.

@темы: нытье без жилетки, поток сознания

16:29 

lock Доступ к записи ограничен

Генератор кубиков
Закрытая запись, не предназначенная для публичного просмотра

URL
18:14 

lock Доступ к записи ограничен

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Закрытая запись, не предназначенная для публичного просмотра

URL
17:21 

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Генератор кубиков
Закрытая запись, не предназначенная для публичного просмотра

URL
01:26 

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Генератор кубиков
Закрытая запись, не предназначенная для публичного просмотра

URL
23:48 

I don't know

Генератор кубиков
I don't know how people work between themselves.
And I try to write, heh.
I guess I do when I write, but not when it comes to me, in real life.
I see one character asking another "Walk with me?" in an entirely neutral circumstance, and I wonder, "wow, people do that?" But they do. I know they do. I did. I walked with that guy from machines through the exhibition for three hours, talking stuff (machines, mills, lasers, other equipment, what they do, what we do, etc), and it was just a social thing, a courtesy thing. People do that. It's not black and white. Interpersonal interaction is not a choice between the white of "strong common interests" or "being a team" or "romantic interest" and the black of aggression and violence. Sometimes people just do nice stuff together without one investing something first. It happens, really happens. Why don't I know that on some instinctual level?
Why is it that I think that if I don't invest something first, there's no good interaction to follow?
I don't mean money. It's seldom money that I invest. Usually effort.
And isn't it why my creativity is failing me lately? That I used it all up, paying for people being nice?
I really should go to the 'con. Even if they end up providing no dance classes (there's a line in the description, but none in the actual schedule). Just for that nice feeling. For pleasant interaction. Paying the price for the ticket is actually cheaper that what I normally do, effort-wise. Simply because an hour of my good work is worth much more.
Which means I need to buy dancing shoes tomorrow. Just in case there are dance classes. If there aren't, I can use them at a later date.

And goddamn hell, I wonder if my mode of operation of bying my way into someone's graces with fan-content is viewed as seeing and appreciating that person's work instead of the person themselves. I guess it does.
At least it did once.
I'm so freaking sorry.

@музыка: Jem - It's Amazing

@темы: фак мой мозг, поток сознания, EN

12:11 

dammit

Генератор кубиков
DAMMIT!
Dammit dammit!
Why am I doing this.
It's... it's a good emotion, overall, actually. Fun, somewhat... but god, does it tear at me. And I want to scream, and there's no point, and I know what I should really do, what might fix it, but it's hard, god dammit it's hard, and most of the time I'm so weary I've grown indifferent, but I decided to - well, no actually it happened accidentally - anyway, I ended up refreshing it all, jump-starting that drive while opening that old wound as well, and dammit, dammit! What do I do, how do I keep that drive and not that pain? How do I save myself from that excruciating regret? How do I do it?

@темы: EN, поток сознания

11:47 

...

Генератор кубиков
Okay, sometimes I get sad and try to find a song to express it... and end up getting distracted with choosing the version. :tonguetxt:
Still haven't found a satisfying variant.
I guess it's just as well.

@темы: поток сознания, EN

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